I'm reading your thoughts in this incredibly moving writing one week after you wrote it. My own life has been filled with painful thoughts about forgiveness of my father (now 91) for unspeakably horrible behavior. I've tried to step into his shoes and try to understand how he could have done the things he did.....unforgivable, my mind would say. And I read your words KNOWING that forgiveness is not about excusing the behavior but SOOOO much more.....for me, for the health of our family, for seeing what being raised brutally can perpetrate in someone, like my dad. Such confusing emotions. AND, THEN, I look at my own life and where I have made choices that could be so hurtful to others.....in a divorce, in family secrets still locked in my heart, in "blaming" rather than looking in the mirror. Your sharing has really touched a nerve in me at a time where life is FULL of emotions for other reasons and work that needs to be done....quite literally like legal stuff. My self care is about rest, for sure. But it is bigger. How will I open my heart to the areas I've shut away, and how will I take even tiny steps in the near future to honestly look at, lean into, and hold my feelings? Good question. OK. Breathe.
Barb, this was so powerful for me. Yes, I too think there are some things that are unforgivable. That is why Grace works so much better for me. It allows me to create space from the unforgivable to tend to myself. I can't wait to share this podcast interview I had around this article and let you hear how it even went layers deeper for me in that conversation. ❤️
I'm reading your thoughts in this incredibly moving writing one week after you wrote it. My own life has been filled with painful thoughts about forgiveness of my father (now 91) for unspeakably horrible behavior. I've tried to step into his shoes and try to understand how he could have done the things he did.....unforgivable, my mind would say. And I read your words KNOWING that forgiveness is not about excusing the behavior but SOOOO much more.....for me, for the health of our family, for seeing what being raised brutally can perpetrate in someone, like my dad. Such confusing emotions. AND, THEN, I look at my own life and where I have made choices that could be so hurtful to others.....in a divorce, in family secrets still locked in my heart, in "blaming" rather than looking in the mirror. Your sharing has really touched a nerve in me at a time where life is FULL of emotions for other reasons and work that needs to be done....quite literally like legal stuff. My self care is about rest, for sure. But it is bigger. How will I open my heart to the areas I've shut away, and how will I take even tiny steps in the near future to honestly look at, lean into, and hold my feelings? Good question. OK. Breathe.
Barb, this was so powerful for me. Yes, I too think there are some things that are unforgivable. That is why Grace works so much better for me. It allows me to create space from the unforgivable to tend to myself. I can't wait to share this podcast interview I had around this article and let you hear how it even went layers deeper for me in that conversation. ❤️
I will lovingly look forward to the podcast. As always, thank you for your generous sharing of your insights and wisdom.